


Linear

by gemjam



Category: Formula 1 RPF
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-22
Updated: 2013-11-22
Packaged: 2018-01-02 09:01:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,728
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1054928
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gemjam/pseuds/gemjam
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>During his penultimate race weekend, Mark wonders just how much cake and kisses can really fix.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Linear

**Author's Note:**

> Many many thanks to zeraparker for looking over this for me and all her very valuable feedback.

Mark wraps the cake carefully in a napkin, grabbing two spoons on his way towards the door.

"You're having more cake?" Sebastian asks him.

"Not for me, mate," Mark dismisses.

Sebastian considers him for a moment. "Who are you sharing it with?"

"Who says I'm sharing?" Mark asks.

"Two spoons," Sebastian points out.

Mark smirks. "Well aren't you perceptive," he says, heading again for the door.

The cake sits on the desk in his hotel room and Mark isn't sure if he's really going to go through with this. Maybe it's too late, too much water under the bridge, but he feels reflective lately and he knows that he doesn't want to leave things like this, so frayed and unfinished.

He showers, taking his time, preparing for something that feels like a distant possibility at best. But things felt different tonight, like old times. Things have been feeling like that a lot lately. Maybe his perception's changed now that he knows it's all just temporary but the friction seems to have eased away and everyone gets on a lot better for it.

He throws on some clean clothes, jeans and a plain T-shirt, towelling his hair half-heartedly before running his fingers through it. It's as close as he ever gets to styling it. He glances in the mirror, a habit more than anything, he's unconcerned with his reflection as he reaches for the cake and spoons, grabbing his keycard before he can change his mind.

He shifts on his feet as he waits for the elevator. When it opens, Sebastian is inside. He's alone and Mark wants to ask some snide question about where his blond army are but he bites down on it, offering a little nod as he steps into the lift, Sebastian stepping out. Mark presses the button for the floor above as Sebastian turns around to face him.

"Who are you sharing your cake with?" he asks again.

Mark smiles, amused, because he can't work out why Sebastian cares so much. He thinks about lying, Sebastian will probably just be suspicious of the truth, like Mark is trying to buy himself favours from the boss, and the last thing they need is anything else to cause tension in the team. Mark's sick of not just laying things out straight though, it seems like far more trouble than it's worth.

"I'm taking it to Christian," he says.

The doors start to slide closed but Sebastian puts out a hand to stop them. He hesitates for a moment. "Can I come with you?"

Mark offers him a bemused look, not sure how to respond. Even if he sincerely doubts that he and Christian are suddenly going to slip back in time three years and end up back in bed together, having Sebastian along is undoubtedly going to kill the possibility altogether. Maybe that's a good thing though. Maybe moving on is exactly what Mark needs right now. The past never did him any favours so why would he want to repeat it?

"Sure," he shrugs. "Hop in."

Sebastian smiles and joins him in the lift.

Christian answers the door in pyjama pants and a T-shirt and it takes just about every ounce of willpower Mark has not to immediately try and take advantage of that fact. It's been a long time since he's had _these_ feelings so strongly. Christian eyes them both suspiciously, the fact that they're together clearly making him think they're plotting something diabolical and Mark has to go a long way back in his memory to find a time when that might have been true.

"We brought you cake," he says.

"Yes," Christian agrees warily. "I've just finished washing the last piece of cake you gave me out of my ear, thanks."

Mark smiles. "This one's for eating," he promises. "I thought you probably didn't get to taste it."

"No, not really," Christian allows, opening the door wider to invite them both inside.

They sit down on the sofa, Mark and Sebastian either side of Christian. Mark hands over the cake and as Christian carefully unwraps it, Sebastian reaches across him to take one of the spoons from Mark's hand. As soon as the cake is revealed Sebastian digs his spoon in and scoops up a generous piece, offering it up to Christian. There's a moment of hesitation before Christian opens his mouth, allowing Sebastian to feed him.

Mark shifts in his seat, spinning his own spoon around between his fingers as he looks down at it. This was a mistake; he'd thought they were past this, things had been so much better between he and Sebastian lately, but clearly this is just one more chance for Sebastian to show Mark just how things stand. Mark was an idiot for thinking he could get this all straightened out before he left.

"Good?" Sebastian asks.

"Mmm," Christian agrees around his mouthful.

"You have to try some," Sebastian says. "Mark."

Mark looks up, not realising Sebastian was talking to him. "What?"

"You have to try some," Sebastian repeats, scooping up another spoonful.

"I did earlier," Mark tells him. "It was good."

"You have to try some more," Sebastian insists. "I think it gets better after it's been sat in a napkin in a hotel room for a couple of hours."

He holds his spoonful out to Mark in offering and Mark can feel himself frown. He doesn't know what to make of this.

"Is this some kind of fetish?" he asks, trying to keep things light.

"It's cake," Sebastian responds, that twinkle in his eye. "Just eat it."

Mark's eyes flick to Christian before leaning forward, cautiously parting his lips. He's expecting a joke, for Sebastian to smear it on his nose or pull it away at the last second, but he doesn't. He slides the spoon carefully between Mark's lips, waiting for him to close them before he drags it slowly out again, his eyes fixed on the movement. The buttercream is sweet, the sponge soft and rich, and Mark almost wants to groan. It does taste better now. Sebastian bites down on his lip as he watches him.

"Yeah," Mark agrees, licking his lips. "Good."

Sebastian nods. His eyes flick down to the cake. "Can I have some?"

"You've got a spoon," Mark points out.

"So have you," Sebastian counters.

Mark looks at Christian again because he honestly has no idea what to make of this. It feels like practiced seduction but Sebastian couldn't have had any idea Mark was coming here until he met him in the lift. Christian looks apprehensive but Mark can't tell if he's hoping this will happen or hoping it won't. Taking a breath Mark rolls his eyes, deciding that, in a week's time, he won't have to see either of them ever again.

He scoops up some cake, offering it out to Sebastian who leans forward, keeping his eyes locked with Mark's as he opens his mouth. Mark doesn't look away either so his aim ends up a little off and he smears frosting on Sebastian's upper lip. He snorts a laugh, pulling the spoon from Sebastian's mouth and scraping away the frosting, automatically bringing it back to his own mouth. Sebastian stares at him like he just smeared Sebastian's precome on his fingers and then licked it off. The thought makes Mark's face go hot. He swallows.

"Well, I think it's time I headed off," he says.

He makes a move to get to his feet but Christian grabs him by the beltloops of his jeans and drags him back down. "It's my birthday," he states. "I haven't finished my cake."

"I'm sure Seb will be more than happy to help you out with that, mate," Mark tells him. He drops the spoon down into Christian's lap. "Here. You can carry on your softcore fantasies and feed each other cake until the inevitable gratuitous sex."

Christian slides a hand around Mark's neck, pulling him in for a kiss. Mark is so stunned by his audacity that for a moment he doesn't do anything. Christian's lips move gently against his, a question rather than a demand, and Mark can't help but melt into it, fitting their mouths together and letting Christian lick over his lower lip, sucking it into his mouth.

It's been a long time since anyone has kissed him like this and his body responds embarrassingly quickly. It's not quite like three years ago, so much has changed that it never could be, but it's familiar enough that Mark feels nostalgic and needy. Their mouths open, tongues sliding together, and Mark lets out a broken little sound, squeezing his eyes shut tight as he wars with himself to both remember and forget.

When Christian pulls away he strokes the side of Mark's face until he opens his eyes, offering him a soft smile. Mark smiles back and Christian's hand falls away, reaching out for Sebastian. Their kiss is faster, more explicit, all flashes of tongue and clashes of teeth. Mark watches them, feeling his cock harden at the eagerness, the clear intimacy of the act. This is something they do often; present tense.

Sebastian's fingers grip the neckline of Christian's T-shirt like he's scared he'll drift away from him, like he needs a tether. He makes soft noises in his throat and he looks so vulnerable, so the opposite of everything he's built himself up to be in Mark's head, or maybe Mark created that image for himself. As they pull apart Sebastian's face is flushed scarlet, his lips even plumper and pinker than usual, his eyes focussed on Mark like he's everything he's ever wanted.

_A triangle has three sides._ Mark repeats the words to himself because he's scared that common sense will take over if he doesn't. If they don't draw the last line then this will always be incomplete, a series of outlines that amounted to nothing.

They both lean forward, meeting across Christian's body. Their lips are tentative at first, brushing against one another, practicing at fitting together, finding each other out. Sebastian makes a needy little noise that makes Mark want to growl and whimper in equal measures. He flicks out his tongue, Sebastian responding instantly and practically devouring him. It's breathless and intense and it says so many things they've never found the words for. Mark doesn't want to analyse that too much right now though. He just wants to draw a line and then they're done.

He tries to pull back, needing air, but Sebastian closes both his hands in the fabric of Mark's t-shirt, dragging him forward so that Mark loses his balance and ends up sprawled across both of their laps. Sebastian slides a hand into his hair and keeps on kissing him, groaning deeply, and he makes everything feel so vital that Mark starts to believe that maybe he can't live without this.

When they finally part, panting and wasted, Mark looks up Sebastian, wondering how he can possibly untangle himself without making a mess but he's fairly sure he's already sat in the cake.

"I should go." The words come out like a reverent whisper which is the exact opposite of what he was intending. Sebastian shakes his head, arms going around Mark to grip hold of him. "I should," Mark insists.

Sebastian closes his eyes, nuzzling Mark's temple. "I didn't want you to think I was a stupid kid."

Mark frowns. "What?"

"It's kids," Sebastian states. "They do a good job and then they fuck it up." Mark recognises the words well but he wonders at the fact that they've clearly been in Sebastian's mind for all these years. Sebastian lifts his head, meeting his eyes. "I didn't want you to think I was a fuck up. I wanted to impress you. That's why I tried so hard."

"You won four world championships just to impress me?" Mark asks incredulously.

Sebastian rolls his eyes, giving an amused little laugh. "No. But when we met in Singapore, when we spent that night filming together, you were so confident and blasé and I was intimidated. It made me up my game. And now I see you with Mitch and I realise that I got it wrong. You never wanted me to impress you. You wanted to take me under your wing."

"You didn't need my wing," Mark says. "You made that perfectly clear."

"I didn't know what I needed," Sebastian replies. "I was a kid, even though I didn't want to be."

"You did alright without me," Mark points out.

"We didn't have to be at war all those years though, did we?" Sebastian says.

Mark meets his eyes. "I don't think either of us would have made it this far if we weren't."

Sebastian stares at him for a moment, his eyes flicking to Christian before landing back on Mark. "Let's just do it."

"Do what?" Mark asks because he desperately needs this moment to not be real.

"Let's just do it," Sebastian says again. "After all this fucking time, let's just get it over with."

"I have to go," Mark insists.

Sebastian shakes his head. "You have to stay."

Mark looks at him levelly. "I'm not though, mate. I'm not staying."

Sebastian presses his lips together into a straight line, looking at Mark with big, sad eyes. Mark considers him for a long time before he finally manages to free himself. It's not graceful but he gets back on his feet without too much calamity. Sebastian's expression, all lost little boy, is equal parts heartbreaking and so very fucking entitled.

Mark's not naive and he wants to kick himself for even coming here tonight. There's something there, something that can maybe be salvaged one day, but the timing's not right and forcing it will only break it forever. He thinks back to 2008, breaking his leg, the slow road to recovery that had hurt every step of the way. It took years but it faded and he knows the worst of this will fade too. A couple of years, a couple of drinks; good as new is an exaggeration, nothing can ever be new again, but Mark knows from experience things can always come back to good.

He gives Sebastian a little nod, an acknowledgement of the things neither of them can say, and Sebastian frowns slightly but he returns it in kind. Mark turns to Christian and he knows he'll never stop appreciating all the opportunities offered to him when Christian signed him to the team. It might not have gone the way Mark would have hoped but no one can take the victories away from him and he knows that without Christian choosing to believe in him it's entirely possible he never would have made it to that top step at all.

He flicks his eyes meaningfully to Sebastian and then back to Christian. "Enjoy the rest of your cake," he says.

"Thank you," Christian tells him.

Mark shrugs. "Birthday's not a birthday without cake."

Christian shakes his head, making sure Mark is really looking at him. "Thank you," he says again, emphasising the words and giving Mark that look that would have made him weak at the knees once upon a time, protective and proud and honoured. It still snags something inside him, still makes his lips curve upwards.

"Been a pleasure, mate," he says, the words carefully delivered in a jokey tone, but there's a truth behind it. Red Bull felt like home, albeit a fractured one at times, and he has no regrets about the new chapter in his life but that doesn't mean he'd go back and change any of it.

"Likewise," Christian tells him.

Mark snorts a laugh, nodding his head. "I'll see you guys at the track tomorrow."

He turns around, heading for the door, and it's not goodbye, he doesn't do goodbye, it's such a final word that rarely has any place in life. Time weaves in and out of itself and he knows he's 37 but some days he feels 19 and some days he feels 100. There are certain threads that will always run through his life and he knows that this is one of them. The three of them will end up here again, in this situation if not this hotel room, of that he's sure. Maybe that time he'll stay.


End file.
